the Gboyz and link The Plague of Hyrule
by Riku-sama
Summary: no knowledge of gundam wing needed. this is an especially rare sort of fic, and if you read, you will find out why and most likely be pleased.


Okokok. New idea. I'm gonna have the famous GW characters read one of (: Goddess of the Smileys :) Zelda fics. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own GW or Zelda or my friend's fic. In fact, I don't own ANYTHING!!! NOT EVEN THE EVIL PINK SNAKE!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  
  
/the other fic will be in bold, and my stuff wont, k?/  
  
_____________________________________________________________  
  
Duo: Man! I'm so bored!!   
  
Heero: Same here  
  
Quatre: *yells from other room* you can come and watch the pacifist channel with Relena and me!!!  
  
Wufei: Watch TV with an onna? Never!!  
  
/5 minutes later/  
  
Duo: Man I'm still bored...  
  
Heero: Same here...  
  
Wufei: ...  
  
/1 hour later/  
  
Duo: I'm still bored...  
  
Heero: Same here...  
  
Wufei: I guess im bored too...  
  
All:.........  
  
/All of a sudden... an eeeeeviil voice is heard/  
  
EV: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  
  
/The three pilots get transported into a small room with a computer, three chairs, and no door or windows/  
  
EV: heh heh heh.... I'm gonna make you read...   
  
Duo: what did_we_do?  
  
EV: you decided that instead of carrying out my fic you were going to be lazy.... So I'm gonna make you read....  
  
Duo: A comic book?  
  
Heero: War and Peace?  
  
Wufei: A textbook?  
  
EV: NO BAKAS!!! YOU WILL HAVE TO READ A FANFICTION!!!  
  
Wufei: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!   
  
EV: DON'T TRY TO ESCAPE, OR ELSE....  
  
/fic starts scrolling down comp. screen/  
_____________________________________________________________  
  
  
HELLO!!! This is my first adventure story  
  
Heero: oh great. Of all the authors out there in the miserable world, we hafta get a newbie!!!  
  
... Hope u like it, and please review!!  
  
~Disclaimer: I Have a BBBIIIIGGG secret  
  
Duo: *gasp* you like Heero? Oh my Gawd!!!  
  
.... I don't own Zelda!! Isn't that a shock?!~  
  
Wufei: um... no... not really  
  
The Plague of Hyrule: Chapter 1  
Discovery  
  
Link looked out of his small houses   
  
Duo: Cuz he was so depressed. So he went on a killing spree and everybody died. The End.  
  
window and sighed. Life had been quiet since his return to Hyrule. He had spent 10 years by himself, with the occasional visit to/from   
  
Duo: THE QUEEN OF AMERICA!!!  
  
Wufei: um... Duo? There_is_no Queen of America!  
  
Duo: How would_you_know, Mr. Chinese?  
  
Zelda, Malon, Saria, Darunia, and Ruto. Epona was still young and faithful. But now... something was wrong.  
  
Heero: Bum bum buuuuuuum!!  
  
He couldn't place it, but somewhere evil was stirring. Since Zelda became Queen, things had been peaceful.   
  
Wufei: Oh great. Another Pacifist Queen. Just what we need!  
  
Relena: *calls from other room* I heard that!!!  
  
Wufei: *gulp*  
  
Her father had passed away when Link was 18, leaving Zelda the only heir to the throne. All Hylians, including Kokiri's, Zora's, Gerado's and Gorons   
  
Duo: and Morons...  
  
had lived together  
  
Duo: But they didn't anymore cuz everybody died!  
  
All: Except for me! You want to know why? Cuz I had my tray table up, and my seatback in the full upright position...  
  
. Hyrule thrived, rich in trade, land, and peace. But now...  
  
He got up and walked to the table that held his swords.   
Heero (as Link): Hmmm... which one should I use to conquer the world today? The big one or the little one?  
  
The Bigoron Sword and the Great Fairie Sword rested here, along with a sword Link himself had forged, called Evilenemy (though he had no reason why he named it this, he just liked the sound of that name).   
  
Wufei: Whats with all the weird names? Why can't he just have_one_sword, like normal people?  
  
Duo: Cuz he ain't normal.  
  
Both the Kokiri Sword and the Master Sword had been returned to their original resting places. The other swords he gained in Termina had been lost somewhere between   
  
Heero: Between the front and back door of the little house that he was staring out of in the beginning of the fic.  
  
the parellel universes. Also, the Mirror Shield, Hylian Shield, and Deku Shield rested on that table.   
  
Wufei: There was also the Whatchamacallit Bow, and the Sumthinorother Bow, and the Yaddayadda Bow...  
  
Heero: and the Thisansthis Arrow of Doom...  
  
Duo: AND THE EVIL PINK SNAKE!!!!!!  
  
Heero and Wufei: O.o;;;;;  
  
Duo: WHAT?!?!?!  
  
He picked up the Hylian shield and Evilenemy, which he preferred over all his other swords because of its light wieght and size. To LonLon Ranch! he thought and called Epona.  
  
Duo: And the big, pretty pony jumped straight through the roof an onto the table, cuz Link had never really left the house!!!  
  
~*~  
  
It had been weeks since he had seen Malon, and he was rather excited when he entered the Ranch. "Malon?" he called.  
  
Wufei(as Malon): *singing* If you'd like to make a call... please hang up and try again...  
  
"In here," came the reply. She doesn't sound like herself, Link thought as he walked into her room. When he saw her, all excitement left him as if a whirlwind had suddenly blown   
  
Duo: blown everything off the Earth and then everyone hit a Colony and died.  
  
his emotions out the window.  
  
Heero: Is that possible?  
  
"Goddesses!" he cursed as he saw her.   
  
Wufei: She was *gasp*.... EATING!!!  
  
Duo: Eating? What is eating? I've never done it before.  
  
Wufei: Hmm... I don't know... but I think the soup Catherine made was meant for us to eat...  
  
Duo: that's just wrong...  
  
She was lying in bed, her face gray, and her eyes dull with fever. He rushed to her side.   
  
Heero(as Link): EEEEEEWW!! GROSS!!  
  
"What happened, Mal?"  
  
Duo(as Malon): Oh nothing! I was just stampeded by some wild rhinos and thrown off a cliff!  
  
"Well," she coughed. "I don't know, really. I was out feeding the horses when I coughed a couple times.   
  
Heero: *coughcough* *in girly voice* Oh no!! I coughed twice!!! How terrible!!! I'm gonna die!!!  
  
So I came inside." Here she paused to cough and take several slow, labored breaths. "I lay down, and before I knew it I was to weak to get out of bed."   
  
Wufei: Yes!!! The onna admits she's weak!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
She took another deep breath.  
  
"Do you need anything while I am here?"  
  
Duo(as Malon): Yes! I'd like a cappuccino, the remote control, a bag of chips...   
  
"Yeah. Will...will you pull up the covers, please?" After Link had done this she gave him further instructions to put some hot water on the stove for tea.  
  
Heero: Because he was so stupid and didn't know how too.  
  
~*~  
  
"Oh Queeeennnyy!" Link called, teasing the recently crowned queen.  
  
All: *call to Relena* Oh Queeeeeeeeeeeeeeennyy!!!!!  
  
Relena: *Bursts into room carrying one of those big inflatable hammers (probably from Hammerspace(tm))* DON'T YOU EVER EVEN THINK ABOUT CALLING ME QUEENY EVER AGAIN IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIVES!!!!!!  
  
Quatre: *comes running in after Relena* Um.. Relena... in case you forgot... um... well... er... WE'RE IMMORTAL!!!!!!!!!  
  
"Link, you pest, what do you want?!" came the almost angry reply. Zelda had always hated to be called "queeny", and Link knew it.  
  
"Zelda, listen, its Malon... she's sick."  
Duo: and disgusting, and ugly, and stupid, and um..  
  
Wufei: weak..  
  
Heero: I dunno... she sounded cute to me....  
  
Relena: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!  
  
Heero: eep...  
  
Zelda sat up immediately from where she had been trying to   
  
Heero: stare at herself in the mirror.  
  
Duo: But she failed miserably cuz she's so ugly she couldn't stand the sight of herself...  
  
take a nap. "What?!"  
  
"She's sick. She can't even pull up her own   
  
Wufei: pants!  
  
covers..." He told her all he knew.   
  
Heero: Which wasn't much  
  
As she heard this, she sank back into her pillows  
  
Duo: Which, fortunately, swallowed her up.  
  
. Suddenly she sat up straight, an idea crossing her mind   
  
Wufei: but really it was J-walking  
  
(and from the looks of it, it wasn't a good idea).  
  
"Link, some of the people...in the market...They're falling ill, too! And it sounds just like Malon! I hope this isn't..." Her voice trailed off, and though the young queen didn't say so, Link knew she feared a plague  
.  
"A plague?" Link asked   
  
Duo: happily  
  
faintly. Zelda nodded.  
  
"You've just confirmed my worst thoughts... I've seen a lot of sickness before-" Link remembered how she had   
  
Heero: climbed in bed with him the other night...  
  
Duo: with only half-*Wufei and Heero place some Duct tape over his mouth and tied him to a chair*  
  
to work three years as a healer in order to be a full queen (on her father's demands) "-but nothing like this! Oh, goddesses! I don't know what to do!"  
  
Duo: hmmmmmmmmph hmpph!!!!   
  
Wufei: Do you have something to say, Maxwell?  
  
Duo: mmmph!!!  
  
Wufei: you don't? oh. I thought I heard something.  
  
Link thought it over. "Well, I'll go talk to Saria. Ruto... how is she   
doing?"  
  
Duo: *manages to get tape off his mouth* (as Zelda) *giggles* oh! She's doin fiiine... Link... I saw her just last night. We were-*Duo's head gets wrapped in Duct tape.*  
  
"Ruto? As annoying as ever!" A grin flashed across her face. "Now that she's a queen, too  
  
Heero: not_another_one!!!!!!!!!  
, I talk and work with her lots  
  
Wufei: GRAMMAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
. I'll talk to her and Nabooru."  
~*~  
  
"Link!" Saria ran up to him and he grabbed her arms and swung her around in a circle. She laughed as he gave her and the other Kokiris a hug.  
  
Heero: So it's true! Link_is_a player!!!!!  
  
Wufei: Oooooohhh....That was mean.... I like it!  
  
Getting straight to business, Link said, "Saria,   
  
Duo: Hmmph! Mm-hmmph....  
  
Quatre: *coming in with milk and cookies* Oh, poor Duo! Are they being mean to you?! *Pulls off Duct Tape while Heero and Wufei eat all the cookies and drink all the milk*   
  
Heero: Meany, that was to keep him from saying some, er, disturbing comments....  
  
Duo: Quatre!!!! You're my best friend!  
  
Quatre: O.o *leaves hurriedly*  
  
I need to talk to you." Catching the seriousness in Link's voice  
  
Wufei: threw it back at him!  
  
Heero: She didn't like seriousness....  
  
Duo: Lets hope she doesn't meet you, Heero!  
  
Heero: *points gun* Omae o korosu!!  
  
Duo: eep...  
  
, Saria  
  
Duo: ran away and hid.  
  
nodded gravely and led him to her house. Link smiled as he saw the boy still trying to  
  
Duo: Catch Saria's attention...  
  
pull up the plants outside of it. He drew his sword and chopped all the plants,   
Heero: Hn... I guess he had something against the color green. No one knows why. Maybe he was jealous and felt that he was the only person who had the right to use the color green.  
  
except the one the kid was trying to pull up. That will save him a good twenty years, Link thought  
  
Wufei: That's a first.   
  
as he walked into Saria's home.  
  
"Well?" Saria asked.  
  
Duo:(as Saria) Whats the answer to two + two? Huh? You promised you'd tell me!  
  
Heero: Um... Duo? Only you would want to know that.   
  
Link took a deep breath.   
  
Wufei: How do you do that? Does it go all the way down to your toes or something?  
  
"Queen Zelda and I think that there is a plague running around Hyrule.   
  
Duo: Its been making prank calls and leaving bombs at peoples doors.  
  
Heero: Again something that only you would do.  
  
The symptoms are......"  
  
Duo: oops.. he forgot them!  
  
With each word Saria became paler, until she was chalk white.   
  
Wufei: She then proceeded to write out E=mc2 out on the chalkboard hidden in the secret compartment under her bed.  
  
She had never seen much sickness, being in the protective shade of the Kokiri Forrest. But this...."  
  
Heero: was just what she needed to relieve her stress!!!  
  
  
"Link, I know!   
  
Duo: What? The answer to 2+2?   
  
I know what it is and where to get the cure!   
  
Wufei: (as Link) *yawns* that's just great! I really don't care!   
  
When I go into   
Heero: The bathroom...  
  
Duo: I always admire myself in the mirror  
  
the Lost Woods,  
  
Wufei: Whoa... wait a sec... the Lost Woods? Then how could she even go into them? They're lost aren't they?  
  
Heero: Maybe they meant that the woods were crazy or something... ya know? The woods have lost it?  
  
I often stumble across a door to another world that wasn't there until you came back from Termina." Link had told her of his adventures in Termina... (Don't worry, she can't read minds...)  
  
Duo: Yes she can... be afraid... be very afraid...  
  
"Don't worry,"  
  
Heero: I'm only good at reading your deepest darkest secrets! Not the ones you've already told everyone!  
  
she told him as he winced, "It isn't   
  
Wufei: I'm just gonna call Malon to tell her that you love-  
  
Heero: *Places Duct Tape on Wuffie er... Wufei's mouth*  
  
Wufei: MMMPH!!! HMPH!!!!  
  
Duo: *snickers*  
  
Termina. Anyway, in this world there was a great   
  
Wufei: Dinosaur called Godzilla and it destroyed everyone. The end.  
  
Heero: now why does that sound familiar?...  
  
sickness. Its symptoms match all the symptoms of the disease you've just described!  
  
Heero: But he didn't describe anything!!!  
  
Wufei: It's her mysterious mind-reading powers, stupid!  
  
It is curable. But  
  
Duo: I'm just a heartless little Kokiri and I really don't care about anyone who's gonna die so just forget about it. Ok?  
  
.... I know not   
  
Duo: The answer to 2+2. So sorry I disappointed you...  
  
Heero: um... Duo? Let it rest, ok?  
  
where to get the cure. It is only located in the Otherworld." She sighed, but Link pulled   
  
Duo: out a big purple dinosaur.  
  
Wufei: *as Saria* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
her into a big, brotherly hug.  
  
Heero: *gasps* you mean she was a boy all the time? OMG!!!  
  
"You don't know how much of a help you've been, squirt," he told her.   
  
Duo: Yes I do cuz I'm a mind-reading twerp, remember, Link?  
  
"I'll be back soon!" he promised.  
  
Wufei: (as Saria) Dang...   
  
~*~   
  
*Knock Knock*  
  
Heero: who's there?  
  
Duo: Impatient cow...  
  
Heero: Impatient co-  
  
Duo: MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...  
  
"Come in!" Link opened the door to Zelda's chambers to find three queens sitting in the middle,   
  
Wufei: Doing-  
  
Duo and Heero: *tape his mouth again* (A/N: I dunno how he got the tape off in the first place. Oh well...)  
  
holding a   
  
Heero: bag of peeps.  
  
conference.  
  
"Well, well, if it isn't my 'fiancé`', my best friend, and the Orange-haired Wonder!" (Guess who!)   
  
Heero: *pulls out a game of Guess Who and him and Duo start playing it*  
  
Duo: Do you have blue eyes?  
  
Heero: No...  
  
Ruto, Zelda, and Nabooru all stared at him.  
  
"So, you finally admit   
  
Duo: That you're blond?  
  
we're engaged?" asked Ruto sarcastically. "Are you feeling OK?"  
  
Heero: No... duh!  
  
He picked up a pillow and flung it at Ruto who   
  
Duo: picked up an anvil and threw it at Link...   
  
ducked just in time, so it hit Zelda (who was sitting behind Ruto) instead.  
  
Heero: Can someone explain to me how someone can duck a pillow. I mean do you like turn it into a duck or something?   
  
Zelda glared at Link, her hair slightly frazzled.   
  
Duo: What does 'frazzled' mean? *looks it up in the dictionary*  
  
"Some best friend you are," she remarked.  
  
"Heh heh. I always knew you could take a joke!"   
  
Duo: He can read minds too!!!!  
  
Link replied slyly.  
  
"What about me, the Orange-haired wonder?" Nabooru chimed in.   
  
Heero: How does someone chime? Don't doorbells do that?  
  
"What if I can't take a joke?" They all laughed as Link sat down.  
  
Duo: Jeez, Heero! Wufei's being awfully quiet...  
  
Heero: *rips Tape off Wufei's mouth*  
  
Wufei: Thanks...  
  
"Well," he said, "I'm guessing you already know about..."   
  
Duo: He forgot it again!!!  
  
They nodded. "Well, so does Saria. And, she knows   
  
Heero: The answer to 2+2!  
  
where to find the cure." All three brightened at once.  
  
Wufei: (as Zelda) Oh Link!! Please tell us the answer!!! We're so stupid we don't know it!  
  
"Well?!" demanded Ruto. "Where is it?!?"  
  
Duo: Where did you put my coffee?  
  
"I was getting to that," Link answered,   
  
Heero: but I'm not gonna tell you anymore cuz you're being so rude!!  
  
"and here's the bad news that goes with the good news. The cure is located in   
  
Wufei: Saria's BATHROOM!!!  
  
a different world."  
~*~  
  
The end of Chapter One!! Coming soon: Chapter 2: Run Away!   
PLEEZ REVIEW!  
  
  
All: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESS!!!!!!! FREEDOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
EV: heh heh heh... don't be so happy! I still have three more chapters for you to read!!!!  
  
All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!  
  
  
A/N: In case you hadn't figured it out yet, the EV was ME. Now please review, because I wanna know whether pplz want me to write more or not. Thanx!  



End file.
